Building Confidence and Self-Esteem in Girls.

Come to win by Venus Williams

A book by Venus Williams and her photo, a girl, a woman on the cover-there was no way I would pass such a book, aah, aah. It was such a great find for me in the library. Gold. Even if it was just to bring it to my house and display it so that my girls can see one of their own holding well on a cover of a book, I would do it. I can frame such a book. The book is titled Come To Win, Business leaders, Artists, Doctors and Other Visionaries on how sports can Help You Top Your Profession, by Venus Williams.

What Venus William did ( award winning tennis player, incase you did not know) was to go out and interview quite a few men and women with the core theme of finding out how sports influenced their success.

It was a wonderful read full of motivation and a kick in the butt kind of wisdom. Sports is about taking action. You are either practicing or you are not in any sports-period. Most of the people in the book used the competitive edge they learnt in sports early on in life, as children, and used those skills in their businesses and in their jobs to excel, later on in life.

I was never in sports when I was growing up, even in high school or college. And I do regret. I regret because I can now see how sports was the one thing that would have made me feel comfortable in my body. Back then I did suffer from low-self esteem. I was good in class and that helped to a point. Once I was in college where everyone was bright I was very insecure in some areas in my life. I had a friend in college who was playing soccer and she begged me to join and I did not. I wish I did.

After reading the book, Come to win,  I do believe, now, that all girls should, must be in some sport or game.  Sports spears girls into a competitive mode and they have no time to spend thinking oh, I am ugly this or ugly that, oh my hair, oh this boy. They get up and go, they practice, they win, they lose, they laugh they cry, they sweat.

Drill, focus, mind battles, strategy, all in one package. They get know that sometimes it does not take talent alone but hard work and determination can take you far.

They get to know that you work at something one bit at a time and you grow with it.

I find that nowadays working from home, blogging and writing I really, really have to remind myself that small steps will bring me big results. If I give up or waste time pity partying nothing will be done.

I am old enough I should know better, but no, I want to throw in the towel real fast and move on to another project. I am not willing to sweat.

After reading this book I have decided I am buying a racket and I will start playing tennis. I do not know how I will do it, but I have to train my mind to know that I must take risks and to know that I have to learn and apply learn and execute over and over again to get to my goal.

Okay back to the book Come to win by Venus Williams. Let me share some direct quotes. You will love them.

This is what Condeleeza Rice had to say about skating.

When I was four or five years old I was a butterball. A chubby little thing. When I started skating it did give me a better sense of my body…By the time I was 12 I was five-foot-seven with really long legs, which made it harder to skate. But I kept at it…..I liked skating…I also loved that I had to work very hard and be very disciplined to even get mediocre results. It was difficult for me, but from an early age  I liked things that were challenging….

For those who do not know Condeleeza Rice she was the first Black ( African-American woman) to hold the position of Secretary of State under President W. Bush( USA).

So you can see why I am determined to have my girls hitting the ground and sweating in some sport. So far we have started with a skate board and we will build up from there.

Then here is another quite from another woman Debra Lee-a former attorney and CEO of BET networks.

One of the advantages that men has over women is that they learned at an early age to compete and that its okay to lose and keep going. Girls missed out on that for a long time because we did not have team sports….The more girls grow up competing and learning how tough it is and that you’ve just to get back up and keep going when you lose, the better off we are in the business world,because sometimes things do not go the way you planned.

I keep telling myself and my daughters that, just keep on. My daughter, the eight year old, is doing violin and we are at it daily just pushing. When she sees good results she smiles, but boy it is hard work when things are not working out. But we get to keep on.

Then there is Vera Wang a famous fashion designer here in the US.I did not know she was a professional figure skater and her fashions stem from that. Her mother had blood cancer but she was with Vera at the rink each and everyday. This is what she had to say about her parents and skating.

Through skating my parents instilled in me a sense of discipline, responsibility, wisdom and good sportsmanship. They always stressed all along that it was about the journey.

She had intense training sessions sometimes lasting up to 12 hours. She had to wake up at 4. AM. I mean, look, in such an environment as a girl there is no time to sit and think that there are things you cannot do just because you are a girl. Amazing.

There are many more stories in that book on how sports made women believe in themselves and strive to be the best in what they do. It is a good read, it is a keeper for sure and I will pass it along to my girls.

This post was long but the book Come To Win By Venus Williams sure did touch my heart and I wanted to share it with you. If you have loved this post please share it with others women and girls around you, in FB, twitter, in your blogs.

Cheers and all the best.